September can be a glorious month, full of back-to-school energy, fuelled by the rest and renewal of an August break. Of course, it can also be a complex time, full of painful transitions and significant challenges that can impact our mental health. Here are some issues that can come up in September:
Relationship problems
While a summer break can be a chance to connect with your partner or children, it can also expose cracks in those relationships. Spending time together, away from the familiarity of home and routine, and without the distraction of work, domestic chores and other commitments can cause old issues and resentments to bubble up. Division of labour, parenting, sex, how you relax, how much you drink, who is on their phone too much… Holidays are fertile ground for conflict, and for difficult realisations about our relationships.
Post-holiday disappointment
The annual summer break can get piled high with expectations. Everyone will have fun, get along, relax, make memories and behave nicely the entire time. You may have booked the holiday months ago, spent a lot of money on it, and invested lots of emotional energy in how exciting/rewarding/relaxing/stimulating it would be. Often, the reality does not match the fantasy, and this can cause friction while on holiday, or leave you with a feeling of loss, disappointment and resentment on returning home.
Empty nest syndrome
Young people beginning their university education will be flying the nest this month. As a parent, this can be a profound moment. You may feel very proud of your child, as they start out on independent life, but you may also be anxious about how they will cope – and how you will, too. A child leaving home can provoke deep feelings of loss, grief and personal sadness. Who am I now that my child has gone? What is my role? How will living alone or solely with my partner feel? How did I get to be this old?
Back to work
After a summer break, going back to work may mean returning to a job, routine and colleagues that make you stressed, depressed or angry. Alternatively, you may like your job, but perhaps kicked major tasks and challenges – asking for that pay rise, tackling that tricky project – into the September long grass, only for them to be looming ominously now. You may be painfully aware that the next break you’ll get is Christmas – which of course is a whole other blog post in itself! There is much scope for September to provoke work anxiety. Or, thanks to a break away from work in the previous months supplying a different perspective, this time of year can even throw up wider, more difficult questions about purpose, meaning and how you live.
Winter is coming
September is often warm and sunny, but whatever the weather, we are pitching towards the shorter, colder days of autumn and winter now, and this can impact mental health. Many of us struggle at this time of year. Motivation and optimism can wane, exercise habits can unravel, drinking can increase, and we may feel depressed. The sun might still be out, but the dread of those darker months may already be building.
All of these issues can be addressed in therapy. It’s a caring, safe and confidential space in which to talk about your feelings, and through support, attunement and sharing begin to make sense of them and feel better.
If you’re interested in having therapy, I offer a free 20-minute consultation. Please email me and we can set this up.
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